Preston's start of school

Preston was supposed to do half-day kindergarten this year because that's all the district had funding for and we weren't about to pay for full-day.  Can you believe they charge $300 for that?  CA-RAZY!  But then in May, we got a call from the school that they were going to offer free full-day kindergarten again this year.  Brayden did half-day kindergarten and Logan did full-day and I really think the benefits of full-day are worth it.

Preston was super excited for school to start.  For two years now, he has watched as both his brothers went to school all day and learned fun things and had fun with their friends.  He was excited that this year it was finally his turn.  He had fun picking out his backpack and dreaming of what it would be like to play on the playground every day and make new friends.

The first couple weeks went well and then all of the sudden he didn't want to go to school anymore. He cried when I dropped him off and hung on to me crying for me to take him back home.  It was very hard for me, I mean I'm not trying to be mean to him and I definitely love him and miss him too when he's gone, but school is important and I had to convey that him.

The first time it happened I thought it was just a fluke, he was having a bad day or something, but then it continued for a few weeks after that.  Not every day, but at least twice a week, I would practically have to drag him into school and his teacher would practically have to hold him in his classroom while I walked away.  Heart-wrenching!    Chris and I tried talking to him in the evenings about what was going on and how things should change the next day.  But we never really got a clear answer out of him, and I'm not sure he even really knew exactly all of what he was feeling. 

As best as I understand it, Preston is pretty shy and he was just not making as many friends as he thought he would right away.  One thing about Preston: in new situations he tends to be very reserved and quiet.  He was feeling lonely and a little bored.  Also, there was all this learning getting in the way of the "fun stuff" (i.e. recess and centers).  For some reason, it was a bigger adjustment for Preston to go from being at home with me full-time to going to school.  Brayden only had to adjust to half-days at first and Logan is pretty independent, so being gone for a full day of school never really bothered him. 

The thing that finally has worked now is every morning when I drop him off at school, I give him a big kiss in his hand and he then balls up that hand in a fist and holds onto my kiss tight (we got this from The Kissing Hand book).  Also, Brayden and Logan take turns walking him into his classroom each morning which has helped a lot, they are such sweet brothers!

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I guess some might have sugggested that we pull him out of school and homeschool him this year, but that was definitely not an option for us.  Most importantly, we don't feel like God is calling us to homeschool.  Secondly though, we believe that the merits of going to public school definitely outweigh the negatives.  What a cool mission field for a little kid, right?  That's where God has placed them and they get to be Jesus to their teachers and their peers.  Our job is not over though, because as Christian parents, we have to be very diligent to know what they are learning and help them reason through some of the things they might learn that aren't true.  (But honestly, that hasn't even really come up yet).  We also have to be more intentional about being involved in their social and academic lives as we are not around for much of that.  We love the fact that our kids are around other kids who don't believe the same and whose parents don't have the same rules and morals.  They get to see that the world is not like it is at church and there are mean and rude people, or people who are nice but have no knowledge of Christ.

I'm not saying this to knock homeschooling, I actually have a lot of homeschooling friends and was homeschooled myself for a few years.  We are not lazy, we are not apathetic, we are not unloving.  But there are lessons you can only learn when you are away from home and away from your parents and put in a situation where you must know what you believe and know what is the right way to act and react.  We want them to learn those lessons now as opposed to later, when we have the chance to guide them and redirect, if necessary.  Do our kids always get it right?  No!  But we are right here beside them, not protecting them from the world, but guiding them as they learn to live in it as a Christian.

Is it really this easy?

We have been told that the adoption journey is full of mountaintop and valley experiences.  Days where everything is going well, moving along as you would expect and feeling pretty in control.  Days where things are moving slower than a snail, feelings of being totally out of control and mountains of paperwork to complete.  We've experienced both already in the 8 short months we've been on this journey.

But, when I look back over the last 8 months and I've seen God's hand so obviously at work, I think to myself, "is it really supposed to be this easy?"  Just trust God, take the steps of obedience and watch Him work it out in His time?  No, I don't always feel like that in the moment, but definitely feel like that in hindsight.  I'm not saying that trusting and obeying God are easy things to do, but it just seems like when I do, things just seem to go a little better and I don't have to worry about as much.

I belong to this FB group for people adopting from Ethiopia through the same agency.  It has been so cool to rejoice with those who are getting referrals, those who have their travel dates and those who are coming home and posting pictures of their beautiful children.  It's also been really encouraging to see the posts from people whose adoption journies aren't going as planned, the ones that are taking longer than expected, the ones whose travel dates keep getting put off, and praying alongside them.

One thing is for sure: adoption is God's idea and He definitely does things in a way so that only He gets the glory.  I pray all the time that He will get the glory through our adoption as well, this is not about us, it's all about Him.

Ashten's loves

I'm sure Ashten was in heaven right here: playing the piano WITH daddy - two of her favorite things!

 

Stayin' up late

About two or three weeks into school, the boys were getting a little sick of us being so strict about bedtime.  But our kids are all pretty early risers and it doesn't matter when they go to bed, they will be up around 6 am (Brayden and Preston) and definitely by 7 (Logan). 

So one night we were kind of kidding around with them and said "you can stay up as late as you want on Friday night, but tonight you have to go to bed now", thinking they would either forget or be so tired after a full week of school they wouldn't want to stay up late.  But we were wrong.....they remembered and wanted to do it.  So Chris took them to a volleyball game that went a little later and then when they came home, while Chris and I worked out they laid down (in our bed, lights off) to watch a movie.  (Maybe we were setting them up for failure? haha)

30 minutes later......

 

Oh the joys

Things we would love to do to our house:

• update/remodel the basement
• add an extra bedroom downstairs
• finish laundry room (it's a concrete floor and studs right now)

Things we have to do to our house instead:

• replace our driveway because of all the moving and cracking going on
• possibly replace our sewer line

Any time we save up enough money to even start talking about our basement remodel, something else more urgent and pressing, however no less expensive, comes up instead.  This is the exasperating fun part of owning a home, right?

Exercising

I have never been one who enjoys working out.  I hate being out of breath and I hate sweating, two things that are bound to happen if you do any kind of worthwhile workout.  I guess I had pretty good metabolism growing up because I was never really overweight.  In fact, one year in high school I remember complaining to my parents that I was eating fast food and junk food like every day and losing weight.  My mom said "that's not a problem!!!" And now I can only wish I had that "problem".

After having 4 kids in 7 years, my body was wrecked.  I wasn't eating good, I got winded walking up the stairs and everything was loose and squishy.  I didn't really like how I looked, but I rationalized that if I could eat whatever I wanted to and be just a little overweight, that would be okay.  But then in the last year I noticed that I was headed down a slippery slope.  I could keep eating things I knew weren't good and keep watching my weight creep up or I could do something about it.  When I brought it up with Chris that I wold like to start running or something again, he suggested we do a workout program together.

We ordered some DVD's online and waited anxiously till they came and we could start working out.  We are in our 6th week right now and we've both seen some notable changes.  One being our weight, but more importantly than that is the energy, strength and general feeling of being healthy that we have now.  It's a great feeling and I don't want to go back.  I guess maybe I do like working out?  Well I think I don't really enjoy it during, but I enjoy seeing the results and I definitely like how I feel.  Although I know to stay motivated I need a schedule (who's suprised???), a plan, a goal and a workout partner!

Even after our 9 weeks are done with this workout regimen, we have both said we want to keep working out together (I'm not doing all this work just to get lazy and flabby again).  We might go back and do this again or we might do something different for a month and then come back to it.  Either way, we have learned that we enjoy working out together and it's a good way to spend some time together at nights without just laying on the couch till we both fall asleep.

Waiting

When we got the word that our dossier was approved and we were officially on the wait list, our agency talked to us a little about constructive waiting.  That basically means not wasting this waiting period in anticipation of what's to come, but making the most of it, knowing that it is a season that God purposed in our lives. 

So I've been thinking about it some, trying to come up with some ideas and goals that I can focus on or that Chris and I can focus on together.  I do much better when I have short-term goals and something in the immediate to focus on instead of longing for something that is 2 years away. 

• One of the resources we received from our agency was a journal with a read-the-Bible-in-a-year plan inside with room to journal.  The idea is that you do that while you're waiting and then one day give it to your adopted child as a gift.  We thought that was a really cool idea and Chris and I will be starting that in January. 
• Get in really good shape and learn to eat healthier as a lifestyle not as a diet
• Study Ethiopia and adopt some customs/traditions
• Seek out a personal friendship with at least one other local adoptive family, preferrably from Ethiopia
• Learn to cook some African food (my first attempt was not so good)
• Learn to trust God more fully and serve Him more intentionally

This song has been so much encouragement to me in the last few weeks.  I know that God's timing is perfect in all of this, so whether we have to wait 2 years or 2 months for our daughter, I know that God is in control.  I want Him to get the glory even in this limbo period.
 

Home alone

It's been so weird with just Ashten at home during the days while the boys are at school.  It's very quiet.  I can tell Ashten misses them a ton.  The first week she was acting out a little bit, I guess because she was upset they left her.  The second week she was feeling a little sick, so we did a lot of watching Tangled, playing the iPad and reading books. 

 

I also watch another boy 2 days a week, which has been really good for Ashten to have someone to play with and to get used to not being the baby and having to share mommy a little for when her little sister comes home.  She has kind of reverted back to a little babyish-ness herself though too, which I hope will pass when she realizes that her position as baby of the family isn't not over.  Yet, at least!!

 

It's been fun to have some one-on-one time with her as we haven't ever really gotten that yet and she's finally old enough to have a little personality and interact beyond me just meeting her basic needs.  She is very sweet, but very bossy, so we've been working on saying please and using words.

 

Funny story: one day we were playing hide-and-seek (which means that I find a place to sit with a blanket on my head while she counts and then she comes to find me).  I told her, "okay, Ashten, I can't play anymore, I need to go get dinner ready." "Okay mommy, I'll just play by myself!".  Which she proceeded to do for the next 5 minutes by counting to 10 and then running back to her bedroom or another room and yelling "I found you!".  Apparently you don't need 2 people to play hide-and-seek?

 

I'm sure it's a big adjustment for her to go from having 3 older brothers at home all summer to play with to being alone all day now.  She's doing pretty good though and we are enjoying our time to bond alone!

No more excuses!

 

I was reading in my devotions the other day in Exodus 4 when God calls Moses to lead the Israelites out of Egypt and Moses keeps coming up with reasons why he doesn't think that will work.  It reminded me of when we started this adoption process and we had a list of reasons, just like Moses, why this was too hard to commit to.  Excuses like: we don't have enough bedrooms, we don't have enough chairs at our kitchen table, we don't have enough money, what will people think about us having 5 kids?, what if we commit and then have to go into debt to pay for it?, etc.  But then there was this quote in my devotional book:

By the time God's will is made clear to the heart of an obedient child such as Moses, the outcome has already taken place in the heavenly realm. God's timing then unfolds it here on the earth.                 -Judy Rossi (Enhancing Your Marriage)
 

So cool, huh?  And I can definitely say that that has been true in the last six months in our lives.  It's just amazing to see all the things God has lined up way in advance to work out for us.  We don't have answers for all the "excuses", but we do for some of them and it's been neat to see how God has revealed His will to us over time. 

When I focus on the expenses we still have left to pay or the daunting task of applying for grants or the updates we want to do to our house before bringing her home or the furniture we are going to have to buy, it's so overwhelming.  But when I focus on God and the ways He has already come through for us, I know I have no reason to worry.  Just like God provided for Moses every step of the way, God will provide us with what we need to complete this process because He called us to it in the first.  And just like God worked His will to free the Israelites in spite of Moses' weaknesses, I know He will work His will to provide a family for our daughter despite our weaknesses.

Cooking with Pinterest

I had been stuck in a cooking rut for a long time; we'd have spaghetti, tacos and some sort of sandwich every week.  I was tired of cooking it and I'm pretty sure my family was tired of eating it.  But lately, with Pinterest, I've been able to make fun and interesting and new recipes easily and healthily.

Here are a few of the recipes I have made in the last month or so for my family!  These have all been tried and approved by my family.  (These are not my original recipes, I have added a link to the original source below each picture. If I made any changes to the recipe, I noted those below each recipe.)

Crockpot French Dip Sandwiches
Verdict: These were delicious!  Tasted like a restaurant au jus!
Substitutions: I used dijon mustard instead of Creole mustard



Barbeque Turkey Burgers
Verdict: The flavor on these was really good. But the patties were too
wet and didn't stick together well.
Substitutions: I used 1.5 lbs ground turkey instead of 1 lb. Next time I make these I will only use
2 T BBQ sauce and will make sure the meat is really dry before mixing with other ingredients.

Ground Turkey Stroganoff
Verdict: Chris liked this more than me, but it was really good.
Substitutions: I only used 1 lb of ground turkey instead of 1.25 lbs.  I didn't have
red pepper, so I didn't add it, but I'm sure it would taste really good with this sauce.



Chicken Salad Sandwiches
Verdict: Yum, yum!
Substitutions: I only used 1/2 cup mayonnaise.

Southwestern Chopped Chicken Salad
Verdict: This was really good, full of flavor.
Substitutions: You could probably cut the dressing recipe in half
and still have enough, I thought it made way too much.

Mexican Slow Cooked Pork Carnitas
Verdict: Yummy, maybe a little too spicy for the kids.
Substitutions: I just used regular chili powder in place of the dry adoba seasoning.

Baked Spaghetti with Cream Cheese
Verdict: Spaghetti without the mess of 2 pots at the table.
Substitutions: I didn't add the green peppers, onions or french fried onions. I
would think it would taste too crunchy with that stuff added.

Crockpot Buffalo Chicken Wraps
Verdict: These were yummy, the kids complained that they were too spicy.
Substitutions: I cut the butter in half and added less wing sauce at the end.

Crockpot Sante Fe Chicken
Verdict: These were so good in burritos topped with cilantro and avocado.
Substitutions: None!

This might have to become more of a regular post because I keep finding more recipes that I want to try.  I love Pinterest, I am officially addicted!